Seventh Son

I often throw around the term: Waste of potential, in one form or another to quite a degree. But, it is so rarely that I mean that without a shadow of a doubt. The film Seventh Son is based on the novel by Joseph Delaney; The Spooks Apprentice. Having read the synopsis of the novel, this film was supposedly based, it is clear that they have disregarded the original plot and mainly followed the premise of being the seventh son of a seventh son. That of course is not the issue as some of the best films and TV shows that have are based on books have completely beaten their own path to acclaimed success (I'm looking at you Pretty Little Liars and The Vampire Diaries). 

Having gotten that out of the way, Seventh Son was basically a nothing. The characters were less than interesting as we trudged up and down the land with the drunk, miserable and old Spook, John Gregory (Jeff Bridges) and his latest apprentice who he bought Tom Ward (Ben Barnes). It honestly seemed like none of them wanted to do the job of capturing the escaped  Queen of darkness Mother Malkin (Julianne More). Which was probably the case for poor old boring Tom, the only thing keeping him around his abusive teacher who essentially taught him nothing was the hopes of bumping into the equally boring and ever plain Alice (Alicia Vikander).

The only enjoyment I derived from this film was the fleeting minutes we had with  Kit Harrington before we were downgraded to spend the rest of the film watching Ben Barnes who was probably the only one who didn't get the memo about this film being a big joke, meaning we had to endure him stumbling through what he clearly believed was "acting". 

I wasted 120 minutes of my life watching this film and I refuse to waste any more than I have to reviewing it. Just thank me for saving you that time, and do what I couldn't with it; go and see a different movie, ride a bike, go to dinner, I made this sacrifice so you didn't have to.

*No Unicorns*